What Is an Adoption Reference Letter? [Complete Guide]

Adoption reference letters provide a personal perspective on your family’s strengths, values and readiness for parenthood.

Because reference letters offer insights that can’t be captured through paperwork or interviews, they are a crucial part of the home study process. They offer a fuller picture of who you are as a person and potential parent.

In this article, we’ll go over the details of adoption reference letters and provide an adoption letter sample. If you have any questions or want to start the home study process, you can talk with one of our adoption specialists by filling out our form or calling 1-800-ADOPTION.

What Is a Letter of Recommendation for Adoption?

An adoption letter of reference is a note written by someone who knows you well. They provide a personal account of your strengths, your relationship with your partner and your interactions with children. It’s similar to a job reference letter, except the focus is on your character and parenting readiness.

These letters are submitted to your agency as part of the home study process. Typically, you will need to provide between three and five recommendation letters for adoption.

Whom Should I Ask to Write an Adoption Recommendation Letter?

You can ask almost anyone who knows you well to write an adoption reference letter. The only stipulation some agencies have is that your references cannot be related to you.

While you generally can’t ask family members, you can ask various other people in your life. This includes:

• Co-workers

• Bosses

• Close friends

• Friends with children

• Community members

• Church members

• Pastors

Choosing a diverse group of letter writers can give a well-rounded view of your potential as a great adoptive parent.

How Do I Ask for a Character Reference Letter for Adoption?

Asking for a letter of character reference for adoption might seem daunting, but the people in your life who know and care about you will likely be excited to support you. Most people consider it an honor to write a reference letter for adoptive parents.

When you approach someone to write a letter, be clear about why you're asking them and what the adoption agency or home study provider is looking for. Giving them some background information or specific examples can also be helpful. Most importantly, express how thankful you are for their contribution to your adoption journey.

What’s Included in a Letter of Recommendation for Adoption?

Adoption reference letters should include several key elements:

• Heading: Because these letters are part of the official home study process, the writer should include the date as well as the agency’s information.

• Introduction: The writer should explain their relationship to you and mention how long they’ve known you.

• Character assessment: The letter should list your strengths, values and personality traits that make you a good candidate for adoption.

• Relationship notes: If applicable, the writer should comment on your relationship and your collective readiness for adoption.

• Parenting potential: It can be helpful for the writer to include observations about your interactions with children and any relevant experiences that demonstrate your parenting abilities.

• Conclusion: The letter should end with a strong endorsement of your suitability as an adoptive parent.

• Signature: The writer should print and sign their name at the end to formalize the document.

By following these guidelines, your references can highlight why you’d make a great adoptive parent.

Is There an Adoption Reference Letter Sample?

Writing a reference letter is both easy and difficult. It’s easy to talk about someone you know well, but summarizing everything you admire about them can be challenging. Giving your references a sample adoption reference letter can help them figure out what to write.

Here’s a letter of adoption sample to use as inspiration:

“[Date]

[Agency Information]

Greetings,

I am honored to write this reference letter in support of Michael and Emily's application to adopt a child. I have had the privilege of knowing Michael and Emily for the past 10 years. We first met during a group trip in our 20s, and our friendship has become one of the most important relationships in my life.

Michael and Emily work together seamlessly and complement each other perfectly, with Michael’s patience and thoughtfulness balancing Emily’s enthusiasm and creativity. Their dedication to each other and strong, loving partnership are evident to everyone who knows them. I believe these qualities will make them excellent parents.

Over the years, I have seen Michael and Emily interact with the children of our mutual friends. They have a natural ability to connect with kids and create an environment where children feel safe, valued and loved. Michael is incredibly patient and has a gentle way of explaining things that makes children feel understood. Emily, on the other hand, is wonderfully creative and has a knack for turning ordinary moments into magical experiences.

One particular instance that stands out to me was during a weekend retreat where several of us, including Michael and Emily, spent time with our friends’ children. Michael organized a scavenger hunt that kept the kids engaged for hours. Emily created imaginative clues and stories that captivated the children's imaginations. It was heartwarming to see how the children gravitated toward them.

Michael and Emily have shared with me their dream of becoming parents through adoption, and I can think of no couple more deserving of this opportunity. They have a deep respect for the responsibilities and joys of parenthood, and they are committed to providing a stable, nurturing home for their future child. Michael and Emily will be compassionate, empathetic and dedicated parents, which is why I highly recommend them for adoption.

Sincerely,

[Reference Name Signed and Printed]

When Can I Start the Home Study?

The home study is one of the first steps in the adoption process, so you can begin whenever you’re ready. We can answer your questions, provide you with more information or help you get started. Just give us a call at 1-800-ADOPTION or fill out our online form.

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